Guy walks into a bar, sees a piano being played by a man who couldn’t be more than a foot tall. Finds a magic lamp on the bar, rubs it, a genie appears. “What is your wish, master?”
“I’d like a million bucks.”
“A million what?”
“A million bucks.”
“You wish is granted.” As the genie vanishes with a poof! a million ducks fill the bar.
“That’s not what I wanted!” The bartender looks at him and says, “Do you think I wished for a 12-inch pianist?”

I’ve mentioned before that standup may be like music for me in that, the older I get, the less new stuff I discover and enjoy. The only difference being, while I can listen to old band albums over and over, it’s rare that I listen to old standup albums or watch old standup specials. Although many releases hold up, standup tends to age like milk.

Shane Gillis is a Big Deal and I gave his Netflix special a shot. I turned it off after five minutes. A Shane Gillis punchline could be, “Huh huh, that’s so gay dude.” I wasn’t offended, just bored.

I watched the Roast of Tom Brady this past weekend and while Gillis wasn’t on the dias, he was shown in the audience several times, and his spirit was certainly a part of the show. The special is three and a half hours long… the word “indulgent” comes to mind. Originally broadcast live, the version I saw had edited out the boos that drowned out Kim Kardashian at the start of her set. I’m also pretty sure they added laughs to Bert Kresicher and Tom Segura’s joint set as, not only was it terrible, everyone involved has acknowledged how badly they bombed.

I introduced my kid to the Comedy Central roasts a year or so ago and she was a big fan, so we all watched this roast as a family. After I’d heard several gay jokes, I turned to her and said, “Huh huh, that’s so gay dude,” after the next one had been said. Then I shortened it down to, “Huh huh, gay retard gay,” then, “gaytard,” then I stopped saying it because even I got tired of it. There were so. Many. Gay jokes. At one point, Rob Gronkowski, former Patriot tight end (and now a wide receiver! Wocka Wocka!) went on such a long and passionate string of gay jokes that host Kevin Hart looked into the camera and said, “Jesus Christ!” and I was right there with him.

I’ve noticed, between the rise of Joe Rogan’s comic friends and what the kids find funny these days (even Borat made a comeback) that the pendulum is clearly swinging away from political correctness. And thank goodness for that. Not so much because I think there should be no limits in standup, but more because I am so bored with predominately older white dudes whining that no one can say anything anymore.

I often say that your time on stage is your opportunity to say whatever you want, be whomever you want. It’s your opportunity to do literally anything, which is why I get disappointed when rookies spend their three minutes on anal sex. I feel the same way about political correctness going away. If taking the power back from SJWs means the best we can do is, “Huh huh, gay retard tard gay,” then goddamn, wake me up when woke is back.

All that being said, Nikki Glaser knocked it out of the park, to use a football metaphor. (I was able to appreciate the roast on a different level than my family because I am a sports guy.) If you have a chance to catch her set, do so. I would recommend to Netflix to edit the rest of show down to just her.